Im starting to think that I hate myself. I dont but I do. Does that make sense? I think im a bad person- I pick up girl, get my heart broken, and somehow find another one to ruin me again. I want to love. So fucking much. I want to pour out my heart to someone and love them but my view of love has been so fucked. Does that make me a bad person? I often find myself saying sorry because I can't say what I want to say so I apologize for thinking it... or maybe I'm apologizing for not saying it. Or not being enough. I want to stop existing and see who notices. Maybe my parents after a couple weeks. Maybe my professors notice im not in class. Would my friends care enough to look? Not just send a text and forget... fuck I have too much to say and not enough words to say it. I hate myself. But I don't. Im a bad person but I'm not.