I love my father. I really do and always have, but his misery has cost me my life. His misery and grief he never overcame has sabotaged me from any dreams I had in my life. I'm without wanting for something better for myself. I have nothing to work for that breaths some sort of life into me, nothing to hope for in the future. I've been a shell of myself so long.
Write it down. Let it go. No account, no name.
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