I try so fucking hard to be a better person to the people around me than how I used to be, a better friend in particular, yet still I find myself saying or doing something insensitive or rude. The worst part is sometimes I don’t even realize it until I’ve hurt them. Again. I’m just a bad person. I don’t want to be. I just want to be a good friend. I wish I could never be an inconvenience to anyone I care about ever again. I don’t deserve to have people who stick around, I don’t understand why anyone continues to like me. I’m here now because I don’t even want to vent to anyone I know, because that is burdening them with the problems of my existence. Why am I like this. I don’t understand how I have ever been tolerated. I think it would be kinder if I was just alone.