And I ask them "Can I get therapy? Can I get therapy?" but every single time my grandparent says 'Yes', it never happens. My sister is miserable here too because we talk about it all the time but she doesn't know that she makes me miserable too. I know she cares but she doesn't understand. None of them do. They tell me 'keep living, keep living' but I just don't. I don't want to live. I'm tired of getting up, going to school, having a hundred missing assignments. There's a part of me that still wants to live, that's why I am still able to write right now. Everyone tells me not to drop out or take online school but I feel like it would be easier on my mental health... Honestly? Once that part of me, that stubborn, hard-headed part of me dies. I will die along with it because I don't live for family or friends anymore, I live because of anime shows I hyper fixate over, nothing else. I've literally had to talk myself out of overdosing multiple times and no one knows. I wish they cared.