What is the point of life anymore? I had dreams and goals. Repeatedly i lost every single one. I even did mistakes what cannot be forgiven. I carry weight of trauma and my past. Even my last couple family members are strangers. People who were my friends disappeared. They became only voice and text. I became only voice and text to people. Oneday i noticed im alone. I talk with store clerk more than with my own family. Last time i was with my family 8 years ago. I felt im surrounded by strangers snd weird enviroment i do not know of. 12 people has died as well. I lost my child as well twice. I have no education or a job. I am failed artist who has never been good enought to even earn anything. But still my guitar is only thing i can do even a littlebit. I see absolutely no future or even reason to try anymore. I constantly think i should just start using weed again. I had to quit alone and handle it alone. Man is not allowed to have problems. Otherwise he has no future.