TW: sh topics or self-sabotaging Ik this is very stupid, but back in my old time, I act like I very despise of the math homework, and then I would purposely not doing it, so that when I go to school, my teacher be mad at me and starts hitting me with a stick on my palm, and everytime whenever she does, it might make me cry or feel painful, but thats what I like, I like to feel the pain, and why would I do that? So that I can give a reason to myself instead of actually cut my arms. I'm sorry this is very stupid but sometimes, like, yea when I think of it back again, I missed that pain.