There is not a single person on this earth that would run to me first in a room full of people, not a single person who would put in the effort to look for me, ask others where I am, and run to me with excitement when they see me. Not. A. Single. Person. Im just there, most of the time. like some sort of backup. Like a second choice. I miss when I had someone. When they would put in the effort and look for me. But they don't care about me anymore. So I guess I'm just a random again. "It takes time" "you'll find someone" I genuinely don't believe you. I truly think that it won't happen because I'm an easy person to replace, to "find someone better" of. Everyone I have called a "best friend" or "favorite person" has eventually not cared about me anymore or wouldn't ever choose me first without hesitation. I want someone for myself again. But its selfish anyways. Maybe I'm just unlovable and undesirable. Unfavorable. Unlikable. I bet I'm that one friend everyone secretly hates.