I hate how confusing I am. I love people, making friends and interacting - it’s the only thing that makes me happy. But I hate it when people get too close. I pretend I’m stupid just so they don’t have to know of my opinions cuz I’m stupid; they can just laugh it off. I don’t like talking about my emotions either, if someone gets so close to me they actually hear what I have to say, I just worry.. I worry they would be disappointed in me or maybe life would go on like normal but now that I said that which I normally hide, like how my emotions are a secret, it feels like a threat. I do WANT someone that I can confide in, and trust completely but I also don’t want that, because what if that person just ends up a stranger to me in the future but now they know everything about me? I would despise that! I don’t want to hold anyone too close, but I don’t want someone who knows me. I just wanna be perfect to them.