i feel so alone all the time and i hate it. i feel alienated by my family and friends constantly and it feels like the only thing ill ever have is me and i hate every aspect of me. i hate how i can talk too much while also being so shy that i can hardly talk when it matters. i hate how i can have a short temper around the people i shouldn’t. i hate the way i look and i sometimes feel the way i look is the reason no one bothers wanting to talk to me. my whole life ive been like the black sheep in every group. my mom always cared for my siblings more than me, and my dad never wanted me even before i was born and never speaks to me or has ever shown he cared for me ever while also only caring for my siblings more than me (my mom and dad have different children). i’m can’t stop feeling so alone i hate this i can’t take it anymore. i wanna die but im scared of death but i also wanna live to see what the world could become. i just wish i never existed to begin with