sometimes it just hits me that im 22 and im not going to stay forever young. im growing up and I have to provide for myself because my family is growing up too. every night it haunts me that im going to die one day and it's like im never going to be here again. I won't be remembered and ill just be bones in the ground. I won't have a conscious so I cant even register that im dead. i feel like I've chudmaxxed for 3 years and now i wasted so much time. its hard not to compare myself to others because why did I waste so much time doing nothing? i hate myself for it. my financial situation isn't any better, I've only had short temporary jobs but it's nothing sustainable. seeing my parents age made me realise that I can't keep living off of them, and everyday I feel terrible for not being able to support them. it scares me. my sister tells me to get over it but I just can't.