I hate how insecure and just awful i am to myself. I want someone to rant too but everytime i try and vent i always feel like im just making stuff up so i can be the center of attention. Im only 14, why do i have such strong emotions? i have pretty bad abandonment issues since ive been awful to my friends and im trying to be better, but it still definitly left deep wounds that ive just walled up and ignored. The one person i ever felt connected to and like i could truly be myself with, we met under circumstances that had me lying about who i was, and i just ended up being forced to leave them, even though i knew they hurt in the same way. my life is good and i dont really have that much stuff wrong with me but im still so hollow, and i know i have depression and that sorta stuff, but i still dont really feel happy. Im always bored unless i have constant stimulation due to my ADHD and i love being able to care for someone if they need support, but i dont feel like i get anything back.