i thought my eating disorder was getting better. I still cry about calories. I cant eat normally. It doesnt help that my family keeps making comments about what i eat.. my mom made dinner and mixed it with a sugary sauce and im trying to limit added sugars. I wish i could skip but I know this is why I cant gain weight. I dont want the sugar. I could be eating a fucking whole ass slice of chocolate cake for the same added sugar that's in this sauce. what the fuck. its such a waste of calories, and she drenches everything in fucking oil. i cant wait till I can plan my own meals and dont have to deal with this bullshit, she would get mad if i even try to remove any sauce. i hate sauce. i think sauce is a fear food for me now 🥀
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