My mental health has been getting so much worse over theses past month or so. I’ve tried everything. I tried MAMING new friends, tried to watch new shows, talk to my boyfriend more, talk to my friends. But no matter how much I try it’s so hard to keep living. It’s hard to stay motivated throughout the day. I use to love cooking so much but it’s such a hassle for me to even wake up every morning and finish the day. I overthink about so much to the point where I cry myself to sleep every chance I get. I don’t understand why or how my boyfriend is still with me. Soon enough he’s going to get tired and once he sees the real me he’ll leave me for someone who isn’t me. Someone who’s prettier and skinner than what I am. I’m just so done and so tired. Is this how I will feel for the rest of my life. I can’t even do the things I once loved doing. It just feels all so heavy and I can’t do this anymore. I’m drowning deep in the water and I can’t swim back up. I just hate how I feel. I wish. I.