i feel so incredibly disgusted at myself. i felt a sense of dread wash over me after seeing both my ex and friend match pfps, btw my friend won't talk to me anymore, and i wont see my ex anymore(kinda a good thing, i still miss her somewhat.) i feel so invasive for creeping into my friend's following and seeing my ex's pfp, they were matching and i know i should just let it go, but i miss them a lot. i'm so envious, and i feel so selfish. i hate the way i am and i should probably just end my life sooner or later. but i'm so scared of death that i can only draw my deaths. i'm horribly disgusted at myself, i feel so angry at myself, i want to just beat myself up and tell myself how wrong i am. how nosy i am for looking into her following list just to stumble upon my ex, it's my fault my ex left me for her. i think they're dating, but i hate assumptions, and i hate continuing to be nosy. i'm a disgusting human being.