I'm so tired of being sick. I wish I could just leave my house and try to make friends. But I can't. I'm not physically disabled, so I feel like such a selfish wimp. There's people who have it so much worse and yet I'm spoiled enough to complain about my own life. Even my body knows that I'm a spoiled brat. I've been stuck dissociating for a day and a half now. I feel so weak and helpless. Even though I have so much help, I still feel like nothing is truly helping. I don't feel like I was supposed to exist in this world. I've been so mentally absent that I've practically created my own world. And my God, I'd kill to live in that world. A world that is actually made with disabled people in mind. But I'm stuck here. My brain wasn't designed for this stupid place. But even if it hurts me, it's probably a good thing that I don't have friends. No one deserves to be burdened by my selfish behavior. My stupid mental illnesses.