I don't know what wrong with me, maybe it's this place, maybe it's my family or maybe it's just me. I don't think I have a valid reason to feel this way, so sad and empty all the time, I have a good life, my parents buy me stuff, I have a roof over my house, go to a good school, but it hurts so much whoever I'm constant;u scolded, I've been called a failure ever since my first test, just because I'm the oldest I have to be th best, the example to everyone else in my family younger to me, but I'm just a huge disappointment, a prostitute my dad called me, didn't even apologize, I was 14 when he called me that, just because I wore shorts in my own house, in the space that if supposed to feel safe for me, a place that I feel like retorting to after a hard day at school, but its the place I most dread coming too, I dread the weekend, I hate school as everyone, even people who I think are closest to me hate me, I'm always the second option, sometimes its just too much and I can't explain it.