Im normally a very optimistic about life and how the universe has a plan and to just be positive and it’ll all work out in the end. But sadly I’m losing hope. At first I thought hey maybe I’m over reacting then I take a few moments to breathe and then think positive thoughts because i don’t want an autoimmune disease due to stress. But then something always happens to knock me down again. And I really don’t want that I don’t want to go back to that dark negative place I used to be in. I finally crawled my out. But it’s always something. I blame my relatives. But their is only so much blame to put in them. My health isn’t in the best place. When I was in the dark place it took everything in me to crawl back out and see the light in the end. But this time I know I won’t be strong enough to find the light and might stay in the dark. I try so hard but this time I don’t think I’ll be strong enough this time around. Sadly.