last year at the beginning of school, things got so bad i couldn’t leave my room and i kept skipping days to the point my mother had to go to court. i had to go for most days after that and i thought i was healing just a little bit but this summer left me alone with my thoughts because none of my friends wanted to hang out with me or chat at all, i have a feeling they hate me. and it’s a day before school starts back up again and im scared. it’s honestly gotten so much worse since last year. i picked up self harm, and i have a toxic relationship with social media, and friends who obviously don’t like me. i have a girlfriend so thats better. but im worried about letting her down and giving up. i dont want to do that. i’m really scared. i dont want to die. it’s just so hard to find a meaning