my whole life ive chosen different forms of self harm and self destruction and i dont know how to pull myself put of this hole. When I was 10 it started with traditional cutting. Its not like ive stopped that, it seems to be forever ongoing, but its the earliest i can remember proper self harm. I am now covered in these ugly scars that i know will never go away. Once I turned 11 I began to starve myself, Formally getting diagnosed with anorexia at 12 before being forced into recovery. I then relapsed when I was 14, the starving become far more aggressive and all consuming, reaching a bmi of 13 before being forced again into recovery. This shattered my self image for life. Now that im 16, this self harm form is less obvious, however I know meet up with random men i dont know, inviting them into my house for sex. Some just fuck and leave, while other attempt to stick around. The most recent boy this happened with beat me with his belt and slapped me multiple times across the face.