I don't miss much about childhood, but one thing I do really miss is not being tired all the time. Being able to wake up at 7am and immediately get out of bed and start running around. I've had a good 9 hours sleep last night and all I want to do is go back to sleep. I sleep in the car on the way to work. I rely on caffeine to stop myself falling asleep at my desk at work. I hardly get anything done at home because I'm just too tired. I struggle in conversations because I'm too tired to think of what to say. "Welcome to adulthood" people say. Only I've been this way since the age of 13. And before anyone blames covid, I was 13 a whole decade before covid was even invented. I think it was the realisation that there was something socially unacceptable about me (I knew deep down it was autism) and the constant effort of trying (and failing) to mask well enough. It's exhausting trying to act neurotypical in front of people.