I feel like everyone's my friend but I'm not everyone's friend, I'm nobody's first choice, I'm not the first name that pops up in their head when somebody mentions a close friend.. I feel like I'm too clingy, I get attached too easily and drive them away. Every boy I talk with makes me realise I speak with them as if I like them, I don't know why I do that, I don't like them. Every girl I talk with either only talks with me irl and never in phone or just pretends to like me. I have two friends that I love, and I really hope they love me back that way, because I don't know what I would do without them or their support. I get attached too easily, a new friend? They have to understand my personality or they'll have to leave, my personality is too messy, it's too loud, it's too sudden, it's not even stabilised, one second I'm happy the other I'm on the floor sobbing about how I hate myself and how I hate my family situationship. I feel disgusting about venting to others, i don't know why.