Idk what to do in life and what to look up to I feel I have never been ambitious about anything in life, I've had things that i like but nothing to look forward to i don't understand where did this get into me, now, when I'm supposed to be a functioning adult im confused and scared of the future, as a teen i realised this and just hoped something would end me because I did not see a future for myself, i used to see that as an escape, but now I realise that's not a solution and now I'm stuck with most of not all my teenage year lost due to hopelessness, I've build nothing for myself or my personality till now, I want ambition towards something in my life so i would take actions towards that goal, I also struggle on taking actions when I want to do something such as getting getting fit, I tend to lose hope when things don't work out as I want even tho I understand that's not how things work, for some reason I want constant progress to keep me in motion and when not seen I lose hope