I miss my ex gf

I get jealous way to easily oh my GODD. My boyfriend is making new friends and I’m happy for him yeah like why wouldn’t i be😭😭 but I’m scared he’ll leave me for some other person one day…………..this happens EVERY TIME he mentions someone……. I WANT him to make new connections and stuff but UGH DUDE I CANT WITH THIS ANYMORE IM SO DONEEEE. -K

So I've been in love with this guy for three fucking years. I love him. I can't get him out of my head. Not because of his appearance or his money or looks it's because he treated me so nice. Every time we meet I feel like I'm on cloud 9. I didn't seen for 16 months once and still couldn't get over him. I feel this pull every time we're around each other. He notices me, he makes me feel seen and heard and cared about while my own family didn't. But I can't be with him. I can't make it work because apparently he was thinking of me like a little sister. Now I'm just left feeling ugly, unlovable and pathetic. I have never had a guy who likes me for me. I really thought he did but he didn't.