I'm angry at myself for who I decided to marry, a choice I made out of fear and desperation. I've spent 18 years with this man and he has been such a heavy load on my shoulders I can barely stand. I'm exhausted from being the only one taking care of the bills, housing, parenting, and the future while he doesn't work and refuses to find a job. He doesn't even help with the dishes, taking out the trash, or any housework for that matter, he just plays video games watches TV and smokes weed all day. The hardest part is feeling trapped. We're even facing the possibility of homelessness, and I feel like I'm carrying the weight alone, I'm tired....tired of begging for partnership, tired of giving pieces of myself away just to keep the peace. I feel angry with myself for allowing all of it and not knowing how to handle any of it.... I'm so angry and sad