i hate the way i, as a grown adult woman, get envious or jealous of little children. i see children being loved and coddled by their parents and i hate the way i get jealous of them. somethng about how this is my one life and im never going to experience that or be loved the way a child is loved fills me with a feeling i hate. and i know this is going to affect me and i dont think ill ever have children because of this hoonestly. can you imagine a mother whos jealous of her children? its stupid and i know this isnt something good for me or anyone else but still
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