I want to love i want to go out i am 15, I yearn for relationships and connection but ever since i was assaulted I don’t know how to feel anymore. it really just shows that nobody cares, it’s not because what my assaulter did wasn’t bad, it’s because nobody cares, and nobody ever has. He gets to walk around freely while I’m slitting my thighs daily everyone says it’s just scratches but i’ve seen what they look like open, i see the way i swipe multiple times and I see the way my layers of skin turn white, and then pool with blood, i wouldn’t be surprised if Ive given myself life threatening wounds and just can’t tell anymore. today my dad came into my room because my mom found out and she was crying, I could have cried i could have told him that I wanted to die But i just couldn’t, so I acted like a jerk and ignored him, I went to go take a shower and I scrubbed harder at my thigh than I ever have. i’ve done it so many times and i’ll do it again. i don’t know what to do.