I wish I had friends who could accept me as who I am, I could be a terrible person, I jokingly told my mom about my birthday gift, she got mad and said that my siblings and I never get her anything, I have bought her a necklace, several other jewerly, even if cheap, got her shirts, one time I sew her a doll, paint brushes, and yet, none of that is enough, maybe it isn't, she's given me life and has stayed with us despite my father's abuse, and all she has is a loser gay who's 21 years old, virgin, no friends and no actual interest in his fucking gay ass career. I wish I had some random ass man who could fuck my brains out, I don't know, a sugar daddy? Maybe the only good thing about me is my body, it already got used at 7 years old and more, so what's there to lose?