Why doesn’t it get better? Why is my life still like this? How much more can I take? They don’t even try talking to me. No one does. Why is everything so difficult? Why is everyone so mean? I don’t get it, is it my fault? I can’t understand what I’ve done wrong, am I not nice enough? All these questions spiral in my head every day, none is answered. I can’t stop thinking about how silent everything is, I hate being ignored. Everyone ignores me, it’s like they know. They know it hurts me. I wish for this to end, I’ve been begging for years. I can’t recall how long it’s been. I actually had someone, someone that texted me everyday and talked a lot to me, someone that reached out first. I ruined it. I ruined it by telling on him, by telling others what he had asked of me. I regret it, I deeply regret this decision. I don’t know if it was the right thing, I don’t know anything. I want the affection, the sweet words. I ruined it, ruined it like everything.