I’m honestly really done. I’ll never connect with anyone on a deep level and I’ll never be accepted for who I truly am. Even my family doesn’t know me the way they think they do. I’m such a horrible person for leading everyone on, but I can’t hold out in my environment if I’m not the better version of myself I put out there. I have horrible habits and horrible tendencies and a horrible mindset. I’m snappy and irritable and defensive and sensitive. I’m seventeen, and all my life I’ve either been bullied/attacked by my peers or neglected by the adults I needed most in my life. Nobody wants to help me, nobody wanted to help me, and nobody will. It’s either I lead everyone on and use them to protect myself, or I die. Everyone has such high expectations of me and I can’t meet them anymore because I’m not who they actually think. I’m not who they expect. If only the limit was larger, I’d talk more about the horrible things I do. But it doesn’t matter if I just kms. I’ll be forgotten in death