I love my Puerto Rican family and i'm proud to be Puerto Rican but they gave me an identity disorder for the white half of me like they preach about racism all the time yet they do it to their own family. for years I overcompensated for my Hispanic side trying to get their approval, but I never looked Hispanic enough, my Spanish was never good enough, I didn't know enough about my culture. I tried so hard and nothing works, I stopped speaking Spanish around them, talking about any interests that aren't Hispanic enough, I tried showing them some alt styles I was interested in and they get annoyed. they say it's "too much black" like I so tired of conforming to their expectations of a girly hispanic daughter with no acknowledgment to my white side like being German and American is so terrible? please just leave me alone.