i really, REALLY want to just kill myself. but everytime ive put the gun to my head i think about my friends and family and how much i could hurt them. i know some of their situations aren't very good already, and if i kill myself I fear it will make their situations even worse or even drive them to do the same thing. i love them very much and it's none of their faults im having these feelings. i dont want to hurt them. but i seriously just cant take it anymore theres so much shit going on in my life that my only choice is to end it. my only choices are to kill myself and make everyone else even worse, or stay alive and live in a fucking hellhole. i can't even afford a therapist
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