I often feel very insecure about myself, like I'm either not enough or too much. I worry that my friends don't like me even though I know the moment I tell them that I'm insecure about my value they will be the first ones to reassure me. I feel so conflicted about everything and myself, I don't feel like I can even share my thoughts without thinking about how it sounds or how it makes me appear. I want to be a good person, I want people to like me, I want to be the friend everyone chooses, I want people to agree and validate me constantly but then I feel like I'm too needy and desperate and self centered. I hate myself so much. I'm terrified of being alone and I'm scared people will leave me if I don't meet my own standards. The worst part about all of this is that I don't even want that reassurance. I know my friends care about me, I know I'm worth their attention but it doesn't change how I feel. I want someone to agree with me and tell me it's okay to feel what I'm feeling.