almost all people I’m friends with (well, i view more as acquaintances) actually barely initiate conversation with me. I barely receive text messages from anyone at all, and it sucks so much. Most of my day, i only receives notifications from updates on my favorite webcomics or a new video that my favorite influencer/gamer posted. I always have to be the one initiate, and it’s so tiring. So exhausting—so frustrating. No one ever comes by to spend actual, outside-of-their-schedule time with me, meanwhile I see everyone growing a history together. I feel stagnant, stuck, and growing differently than everyone else is. Like.. I’m a single fish in a pond full of schools of fishes. And I’m not part of those. No one really wants to initiate, I wish I knew why, but I’ve honestly grown accustomed to it, spending most of my time with my creativity. I wish people were more… interpersonally curious about others, because at least they’re willing to hear what i have to say.