uhm, right, well, im not too sure what to say, its been hard ig, ive been feeling like crap, ive been feeling like crap for most of my life... I think it started in primary school, my sister was always THE person, you know? Like everyone knew her or knew about her, and ig it started getting to me, it felt like I was constantly in her shadow... She is awesome tho, she always stood up for me so its not her fault at all. She is smart, got good grades and studies something really cool. And I... well I barely passed school and studied at an art college... So its fair to say that im a disappointmen. Im also a believer of Christ and try to live for Jesus everyday, but I constantly fail, I fall back into sin often, and that keeps on taking me back to when I was a failur, maby I still am? Im just sick of feeling like I shouldn't be here anymore, even my younger brother is smarter, better looking, bigger and cooler than me.... yeah idk, I''m just tired ig, tired of living like... me I guess.....