I used to be super depressed last fall. And I mean like extreme ed, weight loss, sleep deprivation, sh, suicidal thoughts. The whole shabang. But this year iv finally pulled myself out of it. But im not the same person. Like sure i still hang out with the same people. But I’m overthinking everything, and im more opinionated. I’m realizing that I’m just not clicking with others and I hate it. I hate that I’ve changed and it feels disgusting because I feel like an imposter. But the truth was people only liked me then because I was so “chill”. But I wasn’t chill, I was so depressed that I just didn’t care, didn’t care what people thought. Didn’t overthink. Gave away so much, food, art, money. Because I thought I’d never need it later. And now I can’t tell if I’m just overthinking everyone’s actions or they genuinely don’t like me now. Maybe I’m taking up too much space. I want to be depressed again honestly cause it was so much easier then this constant anxiety, I wanna rip of my skin.