When you look thru your messages and realize no one genuinely ever gave a fuck about you ✌️ even thinking back on old memories feels like everyone outcasted you. And then the same people talk about mental health like oh yeah like you understand. Am I really that much of a loser? Did I not try hard enough to be apart of people? I know I fucked up but like cmon. I know I have the vibe that I'm depressed and shit but like do people think I'm just made up of depression? I could be more than that. Did nobody catch hints that I was alone at lunch? Even so they didn't care. They all had their own friends to be with. Whenever I tagged along they would leave me behind. I thought my friendships meant more than that. But they never did. I'm a fucking loser I guess. Even till this day. Better to start making scars on my skin. But I don't even have the motivation to do that unless its a really bad night.