im really tired of everything. i keep cutting myself and fucking up my arms and legs and everything and i dont even know what i want at this point. im so demotivated and live with people i hardly trust and one of them constantly insults me and doesn't do shit but belittle me. i dont have money. i dont have motivation for anything. my parent who lives in an entire ass different state said that they are "working on getting me therapy" but they are clearly taking their sweet ass time. i dont want to kill myself but everything feels so boring and slow and life is just unbearable. i need friends in real life that i can go out and hang out with and not sit in my room in bed playing games. i hate this.