i feel so lonely. so negative. i dont think my life will ever be with friends or even just one person i can trust. my parents are abusive, i dont know what to do. im being forced to mature at such a young age and i genuinely dont know how to cope with this. i cant make any friends, im a fucking loser. i want to have an ego and i want to be someone who doesnt say such negative things about myself but its like im actively being pulled to the ground. i really just want to be happy and i feel like ive never put out a genuine smile in a long time and im tired of pretending like it doesnt hurt.