My grandad got cancer, I was upset for around 2-3 days and got over it... Idk if i became numb or emotionless but i stopped caring... My dad puts so much pressure, he only talks abt studies all the time.. its come to a point where i hate talking to him, academic pressure asw. i feel like dying but i have too much pent up anger against a lot of people, ive been having homicidal thoughts and sociopathic thoughts frequently, fuck i might be losing my mind and myself, i cant talk abt this to my parents cuz they dont understand me, and i cant rant all the time to my friends.. i feel lonely asf in this world... pls good things should come my way... i cant live like this, i desperately want to just finish and get lost to a great college... i realized that im all alone in this journey where everyone else has support but i dont...