I'm in a rough spot where I have like no money to go do anything I'm stuck in a loop of go to work and come home. I can't go out with friends or do anything fun. I just hate that it's not even my fault. My roommate can't get her shit together and I'm always paying the price for it. I'm stressing about how I'm going to be able to pay all the bills alone. Theres nothing to really distract me cause I can't go out and do anything fun. I'm just stuck with my thoughts. I'm thinking over things and the past and it just gets me mad and upset. Like I can't even remember my childhood and reflecting on it I'm realizing just how much I was just dissociating the whole time and why I go numb and why I don't feel anything when I'm having a hard time. Nobody knows the truth. No one knows the extent of what I went through because I stayed quiet. For them I kept my mouth shut just to keep the peace. Now it's bubbling up inside of me and I don't know how to process it.