I still blame myself for my dad drinking himself to death, even though I was 12, even though it's been fuckn 7 years. I can't get it out of my head that if i just ate his bolaneasa or was less of a picky eater he would still be here. I regret not knowing what to do, I regret seeing him get to a point where he was always drunk, and pissing on the fucking sofa because he couldn't get up and wishing for it to just stop. And at that point I didn't care how, I regret it so much. I regret not saying goodbye properly at the hospital. I'm sorry daddy, I loved you but what the fuck. Fuck I hope none of my family see this and see what a shitty daughter I am.
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