god i just want to be heard. i think i hate my ex. i wished him the best, and my mutual friends follow him. they dont know just how toxic our relationsip was. he was avoidant, i was anxioly attached. at first he was obbsesive and mad when i couldnr meet his every demand, left, and would pry his way back. he was pushy to be intiamte, even though i said yes, he was still really pushy and it was my first time. now i feel addicted and i hate myslef. at the end, he switched up saying hes not didnt wanna have that anymore. he isolated me from so many people, i went my entire freshman year of college not makeing a single freind or even being able to reach out to my own friends. my own frineds dont know and are neutral. he wanted "privacy" in our relaionship, yet i know he blabbed to his friends about how much of a shitty gf i was. he let me humiliate myself for him over and over and he liked that i had to beg. i hate that pos so much and how my friends probably sided with him.