i wish i was raised right.i saw a tweet just now saying copy and pasted “I'm sorry but if you can't knock off a 800 word paper in less than 4 hours you are just not cut out for the post-secondary education system”.it fucked me up for some reason. i can’t.im 17 and i have a 500 word essay, unfinished a week over the deadline, that im stressed out about but ive still barely worked on. 500 is huge to me.i don’t even know why. people tell me all the time that i’m smart but i can’t do something as basic as that without freaking out or procrastinating. i just wish i could’ve gone through the public school system like a normal kid instead of being homeschooled until grade7. i’m so pathetic cause i never had to work. i hurt myself over every minor inconvenience. seeing that fucking twitter post made violence flash through my head. i want to stab my chest clean through and cut downwards. i want to hit myself and bruise green and purple. i want to slice out my throat. i hate being like this.