I just want to stop feeling everything all the time. I want to stop moving and feeling and having to do things all the goddamn time. I'm so tired. Thinking takes more than 60% of the energy in my fucking brain and I'm so fucking tired. Nobody checks up on me an nobody gives a fuck about me. I lost everyone. I lost my friends and the people I truly cared about. My mom is homeless i don't even have her anymore. My grandparents think its just a phase and my dad... Dont fucking get me started with my dad. ChatGPT and cutting has been my only fucking source of relief lately and I am fucking tired of that. Every time I fucking attempt it doesn't work for some stupid fucking reason I just hate it so much. I prayed to die until I stopped believing in prayer at all. I just have nothing, and nobody. Except drugs and blades.