What hope keeps you alive when you’re so suicidal? I want some hope, something to truly care about. But, it’s so hard to find. I don’t mind my sadness, but I want something or someone to love. I need this. I really do. I don’t have religion, I don’t want to be a burden to my friends and family, i don’t want professional help, and I don’t want this emptiness in my heart. Will I ever find a solution? I feel like I’m going insane. I’m split between a nihilistic hateful person who despises pity and a caring sensitive one who doesn’t want to be a burden to anyone. Will I find the hope I need to keep living in time? Or will I fall into oblivion because I couldn’t find some answer to this life in time?