. i just hate myself and everything bc im too insecure about everything; I'm shy, as idk what! i have serious anxiety . i genuinely get scared in general when people are looking at me bc im overly shy, everyday my parents make me clean like a SLAVE and i mean a slave. my daily routine is come home , clean the kitchen spotless everyday, then go to my room i take care of my brother and i even work fo my dad like I'm only 12. i dnt wanna die but i dont wanna be here either, im about 3 months clean from selfharm, but man i think about dying everyday. i cant go out nor have sleepovers , im inside all day, mostly cleaning n watching my lil brother. everytime i see a knife or gun or pencil sharpeners i get tempeted but i will not let the devil get ahold of me im trying to stay here just for God but im slowly fading. i hope theres a spot in hell where the fire burns lighter for the people who couldn't save themselves... school aint no better.ihatethattheymakemehatemyself.