I genuinely don't think I want to be alive anymore. Ive been getting really bad again and its been getting really hard to ignore and it feels like everytime I'm happy it tends to fall flat after just a little bit and its so exhausting. I don't think that I can pretend to be ok for much longer but at the same time every single time I feel like I'm begging for attention and I feel horrible. whenever I tell someone that I feel bad im afraid that I don't actually feel this way and I'm just lying to everyone like I'm not struggling with a life altering disorder that Ive been struggling with since I was 8 years old and yet I still feel like I'm faking. sigh
daily life3 felt this