i feel ugly. i js wanna be loved. ive done everything, dating apps, going outside more, talking to more people, posted myself more even im uncomfortable with images of me in peoples phones. i have strict parents that are religious and going outside is not what they want. everyone says im pretty buy i still feel ugly. as a kid, i was neglect alot and was super talkative. i still am talkative but i know that im annoying. i bother people, i overstimulate ppl. im still on the waiting list for getting checked if i have mental issues. i wasn't raised well. i was abused alot and was sexually harassed by my teacher in year 5 but my memory of it went away, all i know was i felt disgusted and dirty and scared so i begged my mom to take me home early but she never did. i dont eat well, dont sleep well and i feel like a disappointment. i get okay grades but ik the career i want to do is not what i want. im disgusting and deprived. i dont believe in god but please god, why was the point of my life?