I'm tired. I'm so fucking tired and it's eating at me alive. I should be happy, I should be ecstatic! I just got a tattoo I wanted for a long time and it looks amazing. It looks great! And I'm now just sitting here sad, wallowing in my own sadness. No one gives a fuck. I'm always going through shit to the point its toxic. I went through too much shit and all these assholes just think it's easy as fuck for me to live every damn day with the trauma constantly assaulting my head. I'm so sick of the constant cycle of depression mixed with some sense of normalcy then back to the depression again. I constantly feel lonely, I feel so alone all the damn time and it sucks because I know I'm not but there's always that sense that eats at me all the damn time. I am so tired of it. I am so tired of it and I just want it to end. The noise, the chaos everything. I hate it so much. The self hatred, the trauma the pain I hate it all.