Never really felt comfortable I never felt small next to others even if they are bigger then me I feel i want to hug someone and cry and let out out everything but i would rip my skin off is someone were to touch me I want to talk to someone but i cant even if its AI in fear of even internet looking like im weak/a slob/a hypocrite I want to be stronger but terrified of being stronger then someone I want to be weaker but terrified of not being able to protect myself I want to starve myself but keep eating while stressed This for all my life What wth do i even do in this situation